On patrol, the Officer of the Deck asked the starboard lookout what he would do if a man fell overboard. “I would shout ‘Man overboard’.” the sailor replied.

The OD then asked what he would do if an officer fell overboard. The sailor paused and thought, then said, “Which one Sir ?”

A woman, married to a Navy Pilot, inquired qbout an increase in their monthly allotment for living quarters, because rents near the Station where he was based were so high. She received the following letter back:

“Class Q allotments are based upon the number of dependents, up to a maximum of three. If the birth of a child will mean your husband is entitled to more quarters allowance, notify him to take the necessary action.”

For those of you never in the military, it seems all branches try to reduce any/all situations to writing. According to the U.S. Navy, “Classified material shall be considered lost when it cannot be located.”

A group of US Navy officers, assigned as an advisory group in Taiwan, were searching for a name for their new officer’s club.

They finally settled on “TAI-WAN-ON”.

A rather old minesweeper was cruising a lonely stretch of the South Pacific and was overtaken by a new Australian cruiser. All the U.S. sailors admired the new ship and the Captain sent a blinker-light message to the Aussies: “You are beautiful.”

Less than 10 seconds later, the Aussie ship blinkered back: “I’ll bet you say that to all the ships.”