{"id":380,"date":"2006-10-26T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2006-10-26T04:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.paragonis.com\/Emails\/?p=380"},"modified":"2009-12-01T04:10:02","modified_gmt":"2009-12-01T08:10:02","slug":"computer-t-shirts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/?p=380","title":{"rendered":"Computer T-Shirts"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>The Top Geek T-Shirt Slogans<br \/>\n1.      Cannot find REALITY.SYS.  Universe halted.<br \/>\n2.      COFFEE.EXE Missing &#8211; Insert Cup and Press Any Key.<br \/>\n3.      Buy a Pentium II 686\/233 so you can reboot faster.<br \/>\n4.      2 + 2 = 5 for extrememly large values of 2.<br \/>\n5.      Computers are not intelligent.  They only think they are.<br \/>\n6.      Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.<br \/>\n7.      My software never has bugs.  It just develops random features.<br \/>\n8.      C:DOS  C:DOSRUN   RUNDOSRUN<br \/>\n9.      C:WINDOWS C:WINDOWSGO C:PCCRAWL<br \/>\n10.     &lt;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;-The information went data way&#8212;&#8212;&#8212;&#8211;<br \/>\n11.     Best file compression around:  &#8220;DEL *.*&#8221; = 100% compression<br \/>\n12.     The Definition of an Upgrade:  Take old bugs out, put new ones in.<br \/>\n13.     BREAKFAST.COM Halted&#8230;Cereal Port Not Responding<br \/>\n14.     The name is Baud&#8230;&#8230;.  James Baud.<br \/>\n15.     BUFFERS  FILES 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!<br \/>\n16.     Access denied-nah nah na nah nah!<br \/>\n17.     c:&gt; Bad Command or file name!  Go stand in the corner.<br \/>\n18.     Bad command.  Bad, bad command!  Sit!  Stay!  Staaay&#8230;<br \/>\n19.     Why doesn&#8217;t DOS ever say &#8220;EXCELLENT command or filename!&#8221;?<br \/>\n20.     As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.<br \/>\n21.     Southern DOS: Y&#8217;all reckon?  (Yep\/Nope)<br \/>\n22.     Backups?  We don&#8217; NEED no steenking backups.<br \/>\n23.     E Pluribus Modem<br \/>\n24.     &#8230; File not found.  Should I fake it? (Y\/N)<br \/>\n25.     Ethernet (n):  something used to catch the etherbunny<br \/>\n26.     A mainframe:  The biggest PC peripheral available.<br \/>\n27.     An error?  Impossible!  My modem is error correcting.<br \/>\n28.     CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted:  Re-boot Washington, D.C.? (Y\/N)<br \/>\n29.     Does fuzzy logic tickle?<br \/>\n30.     A computer&#8217;s attention span is as long as its power cord.<br \/>\n31.     11th commandemnt &#8211; Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor&#8217;s Pentium.<br \/>\n32.     24 hours in a day &#8230; 24 beers in a case&#8230; coincidence?<br \/>\n33.     Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.<br \/>\n34.     Windows:  Just another pane in the glass.<br \/>\n35.     SENILE.COM found &#8230; Out of Memory&#8230;<br \/>\n36.     Who&#8217;s General Failure &amp; why&#8217;s he reading my disk?<br \/>\n37.     Ultimate office automation: networked coffee.<br \/>\n38.     RAM disk is not an installation procedure.<br \/>\n39.     Shell to DOS&#8230; Come in DOS, do you copy?  Shell to DOS&#8230;<br \/>\n40.     All computers wait at the same speed.<br \/>\n41.     Computer: A device designed to speed and automate errors.<br \/>\n42.     Press &lt;CTRL&gt;-&lt;ALT&gt;-&lt;DEL&gt; to continue&#8230;<br \/>\n43.     Smash forehead on keyboard to continue&#8230;<br \/>\n44.     Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue&#8230;<br \/>\n45.     ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!<br \/>\n46.     E-mail returned to sender-insufficient voltage.<br \/>\n47.     Help!  I&#8217;m modeming&#8230; and I can&#8217;t hang up!!!<br \/>\n48.     All wiyht.  Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?<br \/>\n49.     Error:  Keyboard not attached.  Press F1 to continue.<br \/>\n50.     &#8220;640K ought to be enough for anybody.&#8221;  &#8211; Bill Gates, 1981<br \/>\n51.     DOS Tip #17:  Add DEVICE=FNGRCRS.SYS to CONFIG.SYS<br \/>\n52.     Hidden DOS Secret:  add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS<br \/>\n53.     Press any key&#8230; no, no, no! NOT THAT ONE!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Top Geek T-Shirt Slogans 1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted. 2. COFFEE.EXE Missing &#8211; Insert Cup and Press Any Key. 3. Buy a Pentium II 686\/233 so you can reboot faster. 4. 2 + 2 = 5 for extrememly large values of 2. 5. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are. 6. 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