\/*
\nTOP SECRET Microsoft(c) Code
\nProject: Chicago(tm)
\nProjected release-date: Summer 1994
\n*\/<\/p>\n
#include “win31.h”
\n#include “macgui.h”
\n#include “win95.h”
\n#include “evenmore.h”
\n#include “oldstuff.h”
\n#include “billrulz.h”
\n#define INSTALL = HARD<\/p>\n
char make_prog_look_big[1600000];<\/p>\n
void main()
\n{
\n while(!CRASHED)
\n {
\n display_copyright_message();
\n display_bill_rules_message();
\n do_nothing_loop();
\n if (first_time_installation)
\n {
\n make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
\n do_nothing_loop();
\n totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
\n search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS\/2();
\n hang_system();
\n }
\n write_something(anything);
\n display_copyright_message();
\n do_nothing_loop();
\n do_some_stuff();
\n if (still_not_crashed)
\n {
\n display_copyright_message();
\n do_nothing_loop();
\n basically_run_windows_3.1();
\n do_nothing_loop();
\n do_nothing_loop();
\n }
\n }<\/p>\n
if (detect_cache())
\n disable_cache();<\/p>\n
if (fast_cpu())
\n {
\n set_wait_states(lots);
\n set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
\n set_mouse(action, jumpy);
\n set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
\n }<\/p>\n
\/* printf(“Welcome to Windows 3.11”); *\/
\n \/* printf(“Welcome to Windows 95”); *\/
\n printf(“Welcome to Windows 98”);<\/p>\n
if (system_ok())
\n crash(to_dos_prompt);
\n else
\n system_memory = open(“a:swp0001.swp”, O_CREATE);<\/p>\n
while(something)
\n {
\n sleep(5);
\n get_user_input();
\n sleep(5);
\n act_on_user_input();
\n sleep(5);
\n }<\/p>\n
create_general_protection_fault();
\n}<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
\/* TOP SECRET Microsoft(c) Code Project: Chicago(tm) Projected release-date: Summer 1994 *\/ #include “win31.h” #include “macgui.h” #include “win95.h” #include “evenmore.h” #include “oldstuff.h” #include “billrulz.h” #define INSTALL = HARD char make_prog_look_big[1600000]; void main() { while(!CRASHED) { display_copyright_message(); display_bill_rules_message(); do_nothing_loop(); if (first_time_installation) { make_50_megabyte_swapfile(); do_nothing_loop(); totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system(); search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS\/2(); hang_system(); } write_something(anything); display_copyright_message(); do_nothing_loop(); do_some_stuff(); if (still_not_crashed) { display_copyright_message(); […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_s2mail":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-246","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-computer"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/246","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=246"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/246\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":588,"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/246\/revisions\/588"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=246"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=246"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emails.paragonis.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=246"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}